i am twentynone years old

but feeling more like thirtycool.
on the brink of being a fucking adult and it dawns on me
nobody told me that i was still a kid.
bummer.

baby's got beat.

magicmagicmagicmagic moment.

crybabys.

do i even have a blog anymore? did anybody ever read it?
regardless, i will try to once again to prove my existance by posting on this thing

i've noticed a lot of my friends are going on vacation.
who the fuck goes on vacation?
who in this modern world thinks they deserve a vacation?
unless you churn your own butter, forge metals, or weave your own damn fabrics you don't need a vacation.
i'd like to know what exactly it is that all these youngin's are so desperate to take a break from.
society has developed in a way that has transformed work into leisure,
so what's so hard about life now-a-days? i just can't seem to figure that out.
i'd love to hand over a proper vacation, found easily at the bottom of a budweiser can, but it seems that you're all already gripping firmly to it while griping about  how hard your lives are.
just swallow what you've got and make do, please.
you're making the rest of us look stingy.

please tell me these aren't college girls...

please wait for your adult teeth to grow in before you try to be cute in a sexy way, you're giving me the fucking heebie-jeebies.

livin' the life.

hang in there!

disinterest.

peek.a.boo.

college is a copout.

i could live on an isolated farm doing routine manual labor
trudging day and night in dirt, sweat and shit
and find more artistic inspiration than i do in a classroom
my peers breathe arrogance and my teachers who know so much
know nothing about the real world, the world that i want to live in
i don't know if i'll be here next semester
but i know that i'll have greater control over my life
if i leave all this shit behind
than if i continue wasting my time trying to find a place
in the academic world.

seriously, delete your photos

and try a little harder to be sexy, this just isn't cutting it.

i find stuff like this all the time.

please don't upload personal pictures on public computers
because people like me will make fun of your
excessive use of lipgloss and your hairy arms...
and those eyebrows...
is that mean of me?

my boyfriend likes me, even though i'm fat.

creeps and cats.

burgers and ketchup.

caring is complicated.

duh.

apple pie forever.

if my grandma were a country, i'd wear her flag
and if your grandma were a fish i would fuck her
some of the best things i've ever heard come spouting
out of mouths without a second  thought
lips lacking quick enough motor skills to match up
with the lightning bolt of a thought that so
urgently needs to get out
and when it does
it probably didn't make any sense
but i'll gobble that shit up and keep it in my pocket for a rainy day
you are a genius, i feed on you

that sickly feeling.

it's sort of like restless leg syndrome,
(i have that too)
but more like restless body syndrome...
like my body is trying to grow out of itself.
trying to grow out of this town.
just knowing that i could be someplace else
doing other things
makes me sick with guilt...
but the thought of running off
scares me, bad.
i guess this sort of stomach ache
just isn't meant to go away.

growing pains.

i've grown a few new bumps and lumps in the past few months,
they're easy to hide but absolutely impossible to ignore.
i'm not fourteen, i'm not talking about puberty.
i think i'd rather go back to that naive state of living.
or maybe not, maybe consequences are worth it?
but being a teenager and having the ability to point fingers would be so easy
except i'm twenty, and i know that i did this.
my pride is a little shaky these days and when i look in the mirror it always seems foggy
so try not to speak too loud around me, i might just lose my balance...
it would help me if you leaned in and told me in your softest manner
your most horribly embarrassing secret
but then again, i doubt any of you have the courage...
i know i usually don't.
i have this urge to apologize to whoever took the time to read this, except
i just stated that my self-confidence is lacking and i know that's not right
so...
maybe we just won't talk about this in person but you can still look me in the eye?
and i'll know that i'm still cool.
thank you.

pirate kitty

this isn't the first cat that has come galloping

across a street just to meet me

but this cat had one eye, his left eye

he was very soft and he insisted on biting me very delicately

he stood up on his hind legs when i scratched his head

i like cats that think they are horses

a truck scared him off but i think it was the
beginning of a beautiful friendship

is cat whisperer some sort of profession i can get in on?

wise words

a very smart woman once told me that if you're a writer
in the twenty first century...you're a blogger.
so i guess that makes me a writer?
hopefully something along the lines of a writer...

a fan of words that seeks attention, yes, i think that one fits nicely.

the only problem is that i don't always have anything
horribly clever or important to say...

so bear with me.